Pharmacy Technician. Feminist. Former Mormon. Daughter. Sister. Food Addict. Future Graduate Student. Socially Anxious. Former Anorexic. And, of course, Blogger.
I am a strong-headed feminist. I demand gender equality in a world where women are STILL second-class citizens in comparison to men, in virtually every aspect of life. The most frustrating thing to me about this world is that we are no where close to treating everyone as equals-as people. Women are advertised as objects; commodities, and society is teaching us to believe that we are no more than objects, and faulty ones at that. The societal pressure we feel to look perfect and beautiful is diminishing our own feelings of self-worth and I want that to change.
I have been personally affected by societal pressure to be “beautiful” from an early age. When I was only thirteen years old, I developed an eating disorder because I felt that I was worthless until I was thin, and would stop at nothing until I was finally skinny enough to be considered beautiful. It wasn’t until I had gotten my weight down to 78 pounds, and become quite skeleton-like that I had finally cracked and pulled myself back together. I don’t think that anyone ever truly “beats” anorexia. I think that it is something I will struggle with for the rest of my life. I still get feelings of self-loathing after eating anything that isn’t a vegetable, have binge episodes, and kill myself at the gym most days. I’m still trying to figure out how to manage my disorder and not allow it to control my life. Success pending.
I tell you about this experience because it could have been avoided. If society didn’t equate skinny with beautiful, I probably wouldn’t have developed such a distorted body image. I probably wouldn’t have starved myself in order to conform with what the world is telling me I need to look like in order to be of value. I am sick and tired of being unhappy with the way I look, and I am sick and tired of a woman’s value being defined by her size, shape, complexion, and youthfulness. I want to raise awareness to women and girls that our worth does not decline because we don’t fit into a size 2 or that our faces are not perfectly symmetrical and blemish-free. We have way more to offer than our physical appearance.
Objectification of women is just one of many issues I have with society. I was raised in a community that values traditional family structures and conformity, and seems to have a very low tolerance for deviance. I feel like a plague to be avoided around here, because I desire a life completely different than the one i’ve been taught is the “right” way to live. A homemaker is the last thing I see myself becoming in this lifetime, and kids are still a “maybe” in my current draft of life plans. I’m a career woman, and feel that my life would be most enriched and fulfilled by academia and a career. I’m an outsider here, and let me tell you, it gets lonely. I’m still looking anxiously for where I fit in this vast world.
Hopefully this little blurb of information contextualizes my posts a little bit for you, and hopefully the thoughts I choose to share with you spark some insightful discussions and understanding of you, no matter your view points.
Thanks for reading, and please feel free to give me all the feedback you can manage! Hell, let’s argue about something.